the school christmas party is coming we ain't doing rugby no more maclntyre's teaching us waltzing out on the gymnasium floor out on the gymnasium floor maclntyre's out of the army you'll be slippered if you get it wrong and maclntyre's din booms loud in the gym and we've only got our little shorts on we've only got our little shorts on and it's one two three two two we're all a disqrace maclntyre tore us apart and we danced with ourselves when he yellen find a space waltzing with fear in our hearts waltzing with fear in our hearts comes the day of the final manoeuvres all of our heads are awhirl it's getting much closer to d-day this time we're going to do it with girls this time we're going to do it with girls in the arena the ladies were waiting a 12 year-old partner to quide some matches were fixed the rest of us mixed and a fat girl got left at the side a fat girl got left at the side and it's one two three two two we're all a disqrace maclntyre tore us apart and we danced with ourselves when he yellen find a space waltzing with fear in our hearts waltzing with fear in our hearts when you come to my fights and I'm under the lights and you see that my footwork is false don't count me out at the start of the bout I'm just doing the secondary waltz doing the secondary waltz