The Friendliest Thing

歌詞

While I was walking down the beach one bright and sunny day I saw a great big wooden box a-floating in the bay I pulled it in and opened it up and much to my surprise I discovered a * * * right before my eyes I tell y'all, I discovered a * * * right before my eyes I picked it up and ran to town as happy as a king I took it to a guy I knew who'd buy most anything But this is what he hollered at me as I walked in his shop "Ooh, get out of here with that * * * before I call a cop! Son, get out of here with that * * * before I call a cop!" I turned around and got right out, a-running for my life And then I took it home with me to give it to my wife And this is what she said at me as I walked in the door: "Ooh, get out of here with that * * * and don't come back no more! Please, get out of here with that * * * and don't come back no more!" I wandered all around the town until I chanced to meet A hobo who was looking for a handout on the street He said he'd take most any old thing. He was a desperate man But when I showed him the * * *, he turned around and ran You know, when I showed him the * * *, he turned around and ran I wandered on for many year, a victim of my fate Until one day I came upon Saint Peter at the Gate And when I tried to take it inside, he told me where to go: "Get out of here with that * * *, and take it down below! Ray, get out of here with that * * *, and take it down below!" The moral of this story is if you're out on the beach And you should see a great big box and it's within your reach Don't ever stop and open it up. That's my advice to you 'Cause you'll never get rid of the * * *, no matter what you do I tell you, you'll never get rid of the * * *, no matter what you do