Every time I hear the march from Lohengrin I am always on the outside lookin' in Maybe that is why I see the funny side When I see a fallen brother take a bride Weddings make a lot of people sad But if you're not the groom, it's not so bad Another bride, another June Another sunny honeymoon Another season Another reason For makin' whoopee A lot of shoes, a lot of rice The groom is nervous, he answers twice It's really killin' That he's so willin' To make whoopee Now picture a little love nest Down where the roses cling Now picture that same sweet love nest Think what a year can bring He's washing dishes And baby clothes He's so ambitious He even sews So don't forget, folks That's what you get, folks For makin' ... It is a year Or even less What's that I hear? Well, can't you guess? She feels neglected And he's suspected Of makin' ... She sits alone 'Most every night He doesn't phone He doesn't even write He says he's busy But she says: "Is he? He's makin' ...!" He doesn't make much money Only five-thousand per Some judge thinks, he's funny Says: "You pay six to her!" Now he says: "Judge Suppose I fail?" And he says: "Budge You go to jail! You better keep her, ha ha Because it's cheaper Than making ...!" So don't forget, folks That's what you get, folks For makin' whoopee For makin' whoopee For makin' Whoopee!