What were the first things you remember you did And then what were the worst things Cos you got the purse strings to what you'll admit I wanna know what were those worst things Is it hard Is it hard to confess He's got the most interesting dance steps Of anyone I've ever met Makes promises he never kept Got nothing but his self respect Has a smile that would melt your face The professional disturber of the peace Well he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats Yeah he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats Pisses in your petrol tank unrequested expects no thanks So were the first things you remember you did And then what were the worst things Cos you got the purse strings to what you'll admit I wanna know what were those worst things Is it hard Is it hard to confess He's got a house out in shitland, Gets wordy in his own slang Got a body full of heat and hate the sicker mind appreciates Has a smile that would melt your face The professional disturber of the peace Well he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats Yeah he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats Passes every chance he gets never covers losing bets Thanks