ELDER PRICE Long ago when I was five I snuck in the kitchen late at night And ate a doughnut with a maple glaze My father asked who ate the snack I said that it was my brother Jack And Jack got grounded for fourteen days I've lived with that guilt all of my life And the terrible vision that I had that night No, please! I don't wanna go back!!! DEMONS Down, down thy soul is cast! From the Earth whenceforth ye fell! The path of fire leads thee To spooky Mormon Hell dream! Welcome back to spooky Mormon Hell dream! You are having a spooky Mormon Hell dream now! ELDER PRICE And now I've gone and done it again (Rectus!) I committed another awful sin (Dominus!) I left my mission companion all alone (Spookytus!) Oh God, how could I have done this to you? (Deus!) How could I break rule seventy-two? (Creepyus!) And now my soul has just been thrown – Back into spooky Mormon Hell dream! DEMONS Down, down to Satan's realm See where you belong! There is nothing you can do No escape from spooky Mormon Hell dream! JESUS You blamed your brother for eating the doughnut, and now you walk out on your mission companion?! Tch! You're a DICK! ELDER PRICE Jesus, I'm sorry! DEMONS Jesus hates you, this we know! For Jesus just told you so! You remember Lucifer?! He is even spookier! LUCIFER Minions of Hades, have you heard the news? Kevin was caught playing hooky! Now he's back with all you Cath'lics and Jews! It's super spooky-wooky! ELDER PRICE I'm sorry, Lord, it was selfish of me To break the rules, please I don't wanna be In this spooky Mormon Hell dream! DEMONS Spooky Mormon Hell dream! Genghis Khan, Jeffrey Dahmer, Hitler, Johnnie Cochran The spirits all surround you! Spooky, spooky, spoooo-ky! HITLER I started a war und killed millions of Jews! GENGHIS KHAN I slaughtered the Chinese! JEFFREY DAHMER I stabbed a guy and fucked his corpse! JOHNNIE COCHRAN I got O. J. freed! ELDER PRICE You think that's bad? I broke rule seventy-two! (*Gasps*) I left my companion! I'm way worse than you! I hate this spooky Mormon Hell dream! (Spooky Mormon Hell dream!) Oh, Heavenly Father! (Ah...) Please give me one more chance! (Ah...) I won't break the rules again! (Ah...) I can't believe Jesus called me a dick!!!! DEMONS Welcome, welcome to spooky Mormon Hell dream! You are never waking up from spooky Mormon Hell dream! ELDER PRICE (DEMONS) Oh please, Heavenly Father! (Down, down thy soul is cast) Please let me wake up! (From the Earth whence forth ye fell) Give me one more chance! (This must be it, you must be there) I won't let you down again! (You must be in spooky Mormon Hell dream now!)