Curtain opens, spotlights the gentleman Signing his love letter "Best wishes, Simpleton" Dialog swam from his pen like pollywogs He knew better that perfume was gravity Pulling him closer to what could be tragedy Love is blind, deaf and dumb, but never mind You better catch me when I fall I'm on my roller skates 'Cause any ole way that I fall I land in your arms even though it's wrong 'Cause I love my new mistake Intermission gave way to a miracle The birth of an accident grew to a spectacle That couldn't wait The mother was three weeks late So Father Mason clutching his crucifix Baptized the baby in whiskey and licorice What a lovely way Drowning sins in tooth decay Looks like our hero's gonna fall The bough's about to break 'Cause any ole way that I fall I'll be in your arms as we lie awake With our lovely new mistake You better catch me when I fall My sugar trampoline 'Cause any ole way that I fall I land in your arms even though it's wrong 'Cause I love my new mistake The ending turned tragic when many years later The baby had grown up and married a pop singer I guess it was her turn to make (her first mistake) Any ole time at all Any ole way that I fall Any ole time at all Any ole way that I fall Any ole time at all Any ole way that I fall I just lie awake with my new mistake